The headline reads like parody but it’s real. Marvel Comics is doubling down on their Liberal Progressive lunacy, and they’re going out of their way to shove it down everybody’s throats. This time it’s the New Warriors franchise that’s getting infected with the agenda, and it’s so bad even the comment section on YouTube are roasting Marvel for it.
They released an announcement over on the official Marvel website, and also had a follow-up video for the New Warriors, which is a comic a team of young heroes that have descriptors that read like a South Park parody.
The plot involves classic heroies Night Thrasher, Firestar, Rage, Speedball, Namorita, and Silhouette working as mentors for a group of new heroes, Liberal propagandists Daniel Kibblesmith and Luciano Vecchio of The Last Show With Stephen Colbert and Ironheart infamy will be helming the project. But that’s not the worst of it.
Two of the new characters are named Snowflake and Safespace… unironically.
Safespace can create barriers to protect people and Snowflake can make razor sharp snowflakes that can pierce through objects.
And sadly this is not an out-of-season April Fool’s joke.
The character art looks like something constructed by an autistic five-year-old raised by Liberal Progressives who live in Seattle, both of whom have pronouns in their Twitter profile and are sexually indistinguishable from an obese mound of flesh outfitted in problem glasses Oh Wonder clothing paraphernalia, all while boasting about their supposed “genderless” child’s art being posted on the digitally barren wasteland known as Tumblr.
The other characters include the obese Trailblazer, who has a mysterious backpack that gives her special powers. There’s a goth vampire kid, and then there’s Screentime… a teenager who inherited special powers from his grandfather’s internet gas.
I only wish I was kidding.
Marvel’s comic book sales have been in the toilet for a long time now. A lot of people thought things would turn around when C.B. Cebulski stepped into the role of editor-in-chief, but they’re still heavily pushing their woke propaganda.
The typical Centrists™ will say “But these are original characters!” and my response would be “They could have made cool original characters without attaching it to an established franchise!” but that kind of logic just goes right over their heads. A lot of people these days are so brainwashed on the agitprop that think that poorly made comic books are a necessity of our times.
Thankfully, the broader majority hates all of this nonsense and have been investing in original works like Jawbreakers and Blade Devil.
As for the New Warriors? Expect this woke nonsense to join a bunch of other Marvel comic books on the Get Woke, Go Broke Master List.
(Thanks for the news tip Lunar Archivist and Richard Pell)
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